So you have a couple of options and you are not sure which to do, or take. Hold one option in your mind and imagine how it would feel if you did and didn’t follow through. Go with what makes you genuinely feel good.
This isn’t about making a decision that makes someone else feel good, then you can feel good. That’s a poor habit to get into. Get out of it by putting yourself first. You are not here to please others.
When you learn to put yourself first, you will begin to be yourself.
This new you will lead to changes in all areas of your life. Friends will change. Family relationships will change. And, not necessarily for the worse. You will actually feel a stronger bond to them because you will be living and being more authentically. You will feel good about who you are and who you have become.
How to get started putting yourself first
For most of my adult life, I thought being kind, polite, and nice was the key to being successful. I could never understand why that jerk gets paid more…or, gets the girl/guy they like…why they are popular. Oh well, time to get over it.
So, how did I do it? It really comes down to this questions I ask myself…
Is what I am being/doing now leading me to where I want to be? And, it really isn’t so much about leading, as I’m really checking in to my current state. Then the question becomes, why am I wasting my time, energy, and resources on feeling bad on that person, or what they did?
Once you realize how much time you spend on things that don’t meet your needs, or make you feel good, you quickly see why your life is the way it is. You begin to see how your thoughts and emotions match your lifestyle.
The idea is to get you to see the amount of pain or discomfort you are causing yourself and inspire you to change your way of being.
But I’m already aware of the pain I cause myself, you may be thinking.
Great, that’s where you are. You’ve spent decades shaping yourself to feel this way. It’s going to take time and effort to re-shape yourself.